Been too long since I've been here. Too long since I've put down any privates thoughts that can't be public for one reason or another. Life sucks lately and then I think about how many peopl in the world are SO much worse off than I am and I just end up feeling ashamed and guilty plus just as lousy as I started out feeling.

I managed to lose my best friend by being an old fool with a stupid dream that I should have never had and my current girlfirend, for lack of a bettrer word, really isn't very good to me and I keep waiting for it to get better becasue I don't know what else to do... I desreve to be treated better...

Leaving Di is the best thing, as much as I thought it was going to be perfect, I'm now just as positive that it's never going to work... I'll just never understand why the universe would show me something so AMAZING and then not let me have it...

I miss Autum... And her stupid boyfriend doesn't appreciate her enough, she can do better...

All kinds of things I'd like to just keep ranting about but it just depresses me too much...